Being seen and heard is a gift
I’ve come to find that those who seek out my services often have a commonality among them. They want to be seen and/or heard for who they indeed are. They want the greatest gift to yourself and that is the ability to express themselves. This desire is usually masked in various feelings, making it harder for them to notice at first.
Feelings or states of anxiety, overwhelmed, busyness, avoidance, freneticism, people-pleasing, grasping, or numbing are just some of how the underlying feeling of wanting to be seen or heard shows up. The idea of being able to fully express oneself sounds desirable. Still, the path to getting there and actually allowing it to happen is an entirely other ball game. It requires looking at the conditioned behaviors that have carried you this far in life and noticing how they get in your way of full expression.
Unfortunately, this cycle has become the way we humans operate. However, with curiosity, compassion, vulnerability, and desire, there is a way to break this cycle and live as the fully expressed being that you were born to be.
Your subconscious suppresses your true authentic form
When I was four years old, an innocent moment between my mother and I set me up for a lifetime of unconsciously believing that my words didn’t matter. That I was better off not speaking, but rather appeasing. I say it was innocent because there was no intentional malice done. It was a situation where I needed boundaries and consoled in my upset, but neither happened. After years of doing my own personal work, I realized that my mother’s generational trauma was passed down to me.
Through my own work, I have come to realize and embody the truth of who I am. The very fact that I am writing this blog to be read by others is an example of realizing that my words do matter, and I’m no longer afraid to share them. I would also not facilitate groups or work successfully with one-on-one clients if I believed my words didn’t matter.
If you were honest with yourself, could you see that you might incessantly ‘do’ for others in hopes that they will like/love you? Or that you strive to achieve success, believing that this will make you a good person in the eyes of another? Or maybe, if you don’t rock the boat and stay quiet and invisible, then you won’t get in trouble with those you care about?
These are some examples of conditional, unconscious programming to make you feel safe and loved. Your true authentic form of expression is, more often than not, being suppressed by your subconscious. All the limitations that are held in implicit memories prevent you from achieving the greatest gift to yourself.
Self-expression is the greatest gift to yourself
Can you imagine what it would look and feel like to unapologetically show up in life in the full expression of you? To have the anxiety of what others are thinking or saying in how you show up drop away?
How about not having to work yourself into the ground and realizing what it means to relax and knowing when enough is enough.
Or how about standing up for what you believe in and verbalizing it without the fear of being told you’re wrong.
How would it feel to fully express yourself in your life, your relationships, your career, or in your contribution to life?
It might feel pretty awesome, huh?!
I’ve learned to make initial contact with this place of surrender, a safe space is required to witness what is being felt and/or discovered. Any stories that surround it are just that, a story. Yet again, the stronghold of the personality tells you that the stories are true. It takes trust and faith that what you feel in your heart of hearts, beyond the familiar and the stories, are a true reflection of you.
My degree is in Child Development, but my wisdom is from a place deep inside. When you come to me confused, stuck, or frustrated with how you or others are showing up in your life, I will listen to you. I will guide you to see yourself and show you how to discern between the stories you believe in and the present’s reality. This can be a tricky thing to discern. Still, I know from experience that with self-compassion, vulnerability, and a safe place to confront yourself, anything is possible.
Expressing yourself is a birthright
Being able to fully express yourself in life is your birthright. To step into your authentic expression can seem daunting. It appears unattainable and left for only a select few. It can look different for everyone. However, if, when, and how you step into this birthright of yours to encroach on the possibility of becoming more than you were yesterday is the most liberating feeling there is.
To me, it is what gives my personal life its richness. I also know that the climb never ceases, and it will always be a choice just how high I choose to go in reaching my full potential in this lifetime. With this knowledge and outlook on life, I help you begin to uncover your human potential. How far you take is up to you, but it’s worth the exploration.
If you value your deep, unspoken desires as much as you value all the other people and situations that take priority in your life, call me at 415.640.7198, and let’s discuss how can I help you. This season welcome the opportunity to reclaim yourself and receive the greatest gift of all: the truth of who you are.